What I did to stop my eyeglasses from always sliding down my nose

There I was drunk as a skunk, with my vomit all over my legs. I was decked out in the parking lot behind a convenience store making a mess of myself. I had been crying too because Becky broke up with me. Not only did she break up with me, she told me plain why she broke up with me and to do so with my next door neighbor Jim, who I hate most in the world.

Face it Greg, you’re like a total loser. You weren’t this bad in the beginning but you got worse and worse. You started getting fatter and fatter and then you started buying those pants with the elastic waist. All you do is stuff your face and play World of Warcraft all day and night when you’re not working. And your glasses always slip down your nose. You’re pushing them up a million times a day. It’s really embarrassing to be seen with you.

And with that she broke my heart into a trillion pieces. I felt like the crappiest piece of crap in this crappy world. I went to the store and bought a bottle of gin and have been nursing since.

I don’t know what happened to me, but things just fell apart. I’ll never get someone as good as Becky.

It was then dark thoughts started pouring into my head. Luckily I passed out.

The next day it felt like something died in my mouth and there were a thousand jackhammers going off in my head. But I resolved to fix my life and show Becky up. I listed all my problems and one by one put them into Google to find a solution for.

When I typed in, stopping slipping glasses, I came across a product called Keepons eyewear retainers. So I ordered them. I figured no big deal if they don’t work. They’re only six dollars and that includes free shipping from Hong Kong and a tracking number to see the status of my delivery. Then I moved onto the next problem in my life and the next.

Two weeks later, the Keepons arrived. That was 6 months ago and let me tell you this. They stopped my glasses from slipping and changed my life. Now I have a new girlfriend and her name is Yasmine. Yasmine is gorgeous and I’m not bad either. I’ve lost 35 pounds thanks to running all the time.